11 March 2009
The Shiny Thing
You know, I am in a very interesting stage in my life. I know being a college student is really kind of weird for everyone because you don't really belong at home anymore, but you know you aren't going to be at school in that drab apartment forever either. So where do I really belong right now? What is my identity? I have found my home away from home in my friends. I don't care what anyone else says I DO happen to have the best best friends in the world. I have made a set of siblings in Mark Sam and Jenelyn who, weirdly enough, are getting married to each other soon. Good things they aren't like siblings to each other :) When I found out that they were getting married (and I've known for a while. Secrets are HARD) something dawned on me. There go my last two very best friends in the whole world off into married land where singles cannot follow. Drat. Every single (no pun intended) one of the four girls that I felt closest to as friend in the last two years will have all bitten the dust within nine months. I know this is beginning to sounds like I am not happy for them. That is not the case! They have found incredible young men! Coli, Michelle, and Moe, I'm a little partial to Mark Sam because he is my brother, so I think Jenelyn is the luckiest, but you all did very well too! :D Coli, you can just see how much Scott adores you when you two are in a room together. Michelle, I love watching you and Jason laugh together. Moe, you and Paul were pretty much matched in heaven. The internet can do good things :) Jenelyn, take good care of my big brother please. I think he likes you. ANYWAY.....I love every single one of these people. Then why can't I shake the feeling of being left behind? It is like I was standing in a happy circle living and laughing with these eight people, and then they all saw something shiny at the same time, and I didn't see it, so they all ran away at the exact same time to catch the shiny thing, and then I was the only one still standing in the circle....except it wasn't a circle anymore. Just me. A vertical line instead of a circle. By myself. All of my friends chasing the shiny thing. I wouldn't want to hold them back from the shiny thing for a second, but....all at once...? I think it is probably the doing of the Big Man Upstairs, which means I HAVE to be okay with it....He probably thinks it's funny. Teaching me patience or something. I don't even want to get married this very second, but do I have to be left alone?! Well, the answer is clearly......There is no clear answer!
Okay. Phew. I'm done getting my selfish rant out. I feel better. You four girls are incredible! I am so glad that you found worthy men! Now you have to help me find one! Kapish? :D