28 August 2010

This is a fear causer that frequents my life

I know, KNOW, and am certain, positive and certain that if I use the handicap stall in the bathroom, a person in a wheelchair is going to come in, have to go super bad, and not have anywhere to go because I am manning the stall. They will sit there, and when I walk out they will stare at me, then look at all the other empty regular stalls, and look back and forth and back and forth, getting angrier and angrier (meanwhile I just stand there with an awkward look on my face, really just concentrating on trying to remember if I zipped up my fly), and then they will yell at me about how insensitive I am, and proceed to beat me with a cane.

I honestly have this visual every time I consider using the handicap stall, whether it be because the others are taken, or because their previous occupants forgot to do jumping jacks in the stall before they left to trigger the motion sensor flusher thingies.

So I wait, or flush first.

Then, during my stay in my stall, I ALWAYS contemplate the fact that people in wheel chairs do not in fact carry canes.

18 August 2010

Everything Smells....no really, it does.

Have you ever noticed that your cousins family has their own smell? And that cousin smells different from the other cousin on the same side, but also different from the cousin on the other side. Grandparents have their own smell too.

Schools have a learning smell.

Stores have a new smell.

My church has that old churchy smell, like the gym floor has been varnished over and over and over and over.

I always wondered what my families smell was when I was growing up, but of course it is my own smell, so I couldn't ever smell it. It drove me nuts. So I stuck my nose deep into one of the clean sheets that had been sitting in the sheet cubby for a while now, and after consulting with a cousin, decided that must be my families smell. Not too bad.

Fall has a crispy smell.

Spring smells wet.

I have never smelled winter because every time I try, it just freezes my snot up into my brain. I stopped trying that one after a while.

The beginning of my marriage smells like varnished wood.

Cows smell like home.

Mosquito spray smells like relief.

A swimming pool smells like hot.

Reason for this post.....big news.....
Kimee says Ches and I already have our smell! She says it is good :) I don't think our sheets have been in the closet long enough for me to know what it is yet...