Something about the fact that these may not be the easiest times, but we can't simply hold our breath and close our eyes for when things are easier because although difficult, these are the best times. I'm sure you have read many blog posts with similar sentiment, so I won't blather on. But I sure could. Also, blather. What an excellent word.
Even with this being the case, I keep finding myself collapsed on the the couch with relief when the kids are asleep in the evening. These hours are sooooo precious. Should I feel guilty that I look forward (desperately) to these hours when these amazing little people don't need me?
No. Not even a little.
After meditating on the subject over a bowl of life cereal, I realized why these hours are so important for a mom. We give ourselves to our children all day long. At the end of the day we are tapped out. Not a drop left in the barrel. These evening hours filled with Gilmore Girls, Jimmy Fallon, cheesy romance novels, conversations with my husband, and more snacking than the human body should be able to tolerate are how we get ourselves back. It is when we reload.
Because tomorrow we are going to be giving ourselves away all over again, and if we haven't found what we gave away yesterday, (as cheesy as it sounds) we won't have much to give to our children tomorrow.
So when 7:00 rolls around and I am tucking M's blankets so tightly around him that he can't possibly escape without aid before I kiss his little head, its a good thing.