25 February 2013

I will never be able to express this very eloquently

In the last year or so I have seen an over abundance of articles and videos talking about the controversy surrounding homosexuality in today's society.

I am not sure why, but today I haven't been able to shake the feeling that I need to get my opinion out there. This is the only place that I know how to do that. 

Do I believe that homosexuality is against the laws of God. Yes, I do.

And that is where my negativity toward it stops. It seems our society is split down the middle dividing the people who think it is wrong, and people who are fighting for it to be accepted. That is to be expected. At this point, it is unlikely that either side will ever completely convince the other.

What saddens me is all of the hate. I have gay friends that I absolutely adore, and love to be around. They do not make me uncomfortable in any way. 

If I had a voice that anyone cared to hear(I will pretend that I am Jennifer Lawrence for a minute because everyone seems to be listening to her), I would say this:

"You have the opinion being gay is right, or you have the opinion being gay is wrong. That is that. What you need to remember when you are interacting with the person of the opposite opinion is everything else about them! Sexuality is not the sum definition of a human being. We are complex and layered and marvelous." 

You find out someone you love is Gay. If you believe it is wrong, it can be an unimaginably difficult thing to cope with. But, you need to remember how their favorite book is Moby Dick, they can win a cheese tasting contest with their eyes closed, they give the best hugs on the planet, and that one time they watched a movie with you that they hate because you had a rough day, and you got to pick.  I would bet that none of that was driven by their sexuality. It was driven by their heart, their sense of humor, or their passion.

Before you knew they were gay you most likely didn't take their intimate life as a prompt of how to treat or interact with them. If you have questions about it, and you are close to them, figure out a way to talk about it on neutral ground, but understand that if you want them to listen to your concerns, you have to listen to them as well. If you are not close to them, focus on all of the other things about them that you can connect with, and don't make sexuality a point for discomfort, hate, or contention.

This Mormon white girl is pleading, don't be hatin'

09 February 2013

Bedtime Conversations: Five minutes ago, Rootbeer float night, potty talk

*If you don't like potty talk, I recommend scrolling down to a different post.

Ches: I have to go to the bathroom

Me: Do you care if I come in to brush my teeth?

Ches: I don't think you'll want to.

Me: Oh THAT kind of bathroom visit.

Ches: It was the icecream.

Me: If it does that to you, why do you eat it?

Ches: That is like asking me why I breath.

.....touché

08 February 2013

I am not sure how we are in love: Part 1

You guys. I kind of get anxiety whenever people ask me about how husband and I met, or how we fell for each other. I need an audible way to insert an asterisk and a disclaimer before telling the series of events, letting them know that normal human relationships don't progress how ours seemed to. 




Our story makes no sense.

And in lieu of Valentines day, I will try to lay it out there as clearly as I am able, and you can help me try to figure out how we actually got married. Please don't get me wrong. I AM MARRIED TO A MARVELOUS MAN, AND I HAVE ZERO FEELINGS OF REGRETFULNESS. I mean, have you seen our baby? Who can regret the recipe that made that.(too much?)

First Encounter: It was early in September of 2008. School had just begun. I was returning for my second year of residence in Old Farm. Chesley was living there for the first time, just about to begin his helicopter flight training. Our singles ward Family Home Evening was taking place at one of our church leader's homes, so everyone was making their way there. I was already close friends with a couple of Chesley's room mates, so we ended up riding in the back of the same truck. I tried to talk to him. He didn't respond. I thought he was cute enough, but stuck on himself. I had written off attractive men because they never seemed to pay attention to me. He validated this on our first meeting. He claims that all he could see was my insane room mate acting like a lunatic, and doesn't remember me being there at all.  (I don't even get a first impression? SO lame.)




Second Encounter: Sometime early in December, before finals and the desertion of campus, I was in my apartment just chatting it up with Mark Sam and Jenelyn (my two best friends from College who had the audacity to marry each other).  Chesley walked through the door, told me he had heard I gave good back rubs, and asked me if I would give him one. I still can't figure out why I did it. I rubbed the backs of a large handful of strange boys that year. Weird. 

Third Encounter: A few weeks later, campus had been forsaken by gleeful students who pranced to their various homes with the speed that only post-final elation plus Christmas joy can produce. I had to work, and Ches was not on a normal School schedule. We were two of the only people left in our apartment complex. He showed up at my apartment and asked if I wanted to play racquetball with him the next day. Neither of us had anything better to do, so I agreed to come to his apartment when I was off work, and we would go. The next afternoon was cold and gloomy. I could not muster the desire to walk back up the hill to the courts, so I just didn't walk the 20 steps to his apartment. We had an awkward encounter in the laundry room later when he asked why I hadn't showed. 




Sidenote: The boy who had broken up with me earlier that year was in the room at the same time. I was mostly over him. As he put clothes from the washer to the dryer he told me that my excuse was really lame. I died a little inside.

Fourth Encounter: We played racquetball a day later. I didn't consider it a date, but apparently he did. (He will tell anyone who will listen that I stood him up for our first date. Falsehood. It wasn't a date. He had a girlfriend,(of which I was unaware) and only a weenie would have the girl show up at his house for the first date.) I was surprised that we talked really easily, and I quite enjoyed myself. I have always been the queen of awkward when meeting new people, but I was completely natural. I have since attributed that to the fact that I didn't care about what he thought of me at all, so I didn't clam up. I just said what I thought.