no secrets here

I haven't posted in four months. I just haven't felt like it.

and that is ooookay.

Today, I feel like posting this excerpt form a recent journal entry:

"I've forced myself not to feel guilty about being on cruise control today. I went to bed late, was at the gym at 6, so I was tired all day. We watched too much tv, and I didn't get down and play cars with M even half of the times he asked (You guys, he asks about 12387235876432 times a day). That is okay. Why do I beat myself up about these days?

I know someday I will miss this. Too soon probably. I will miss being a dinosaur getting hotdogs and ice cream. I will miss holding my baby girl while she clings to my arm with hers. I will miss wiping bums and teaching to to maneuver stairs. Those days truly are precious. Sometimes it is almost impossible to remember that when I feel buried in them.

Soak it in mama. Soak it in."